Dixie Peach: Ho Hum

Cooler than the other side of the pillow.

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Ho Hum

I've been neglecting to write anything for days on end. I wanted to but I just didn't feel like I had anything to say.

And that sums up this week quite nicely. Nothing motivated me very much this week.

I don't like this feeling and thankfully it doesn't come up too often but it's been one of those times when I don't necessarily feel bad but nothing seems to spur me into action. I take care of what needs to be taken care of but other than that there's not a lot of action. I'm trying not to let this bring me down though. I know this will pass and it's nothing to get all excited about.

Today is normally a day I am very busy but I couldn't get in gear. Not all of it was me though. B didn't feel well either and i tend to not press him much when he's feeling out of sorts. Made me a little sad though. Late this afternoon he said "I don't like myself much today.". I know what he meant though. There are simply some days when you feel cruddy and unlike yourself and you simply don't like it.

But not all has been bad this week. Actually nothing has been bad - just uneventful at worst. And some good things happened. I got a letter from Claire. She seemed to be quite happy to have gotten a letter and the bracelet from me and she asked me to write again so I did. However I know that sometimes it's hard for a twelve-year-old to know what to write about so I made it easy on her. I wrote her a long letter telling her more about myself but this time I made it things that I like or don't like and with it I told her stories from childhood and the like. Now when she writes back and feels stuck for a subject she can tell me things she likes or her favorite whatevers. I even told her things like "I was awful in math at school." so she can say "Oh I'm good at math." or "I like English better than math." or whatever. I figure if we get used to writing stuff and she sees that writing about everyday things is okay then she'll feel more at ease when she wants to write me a letter. That's the theory behind it anyway.

I did the big grocery shopping too - the kind that requires me to drive and haul it all home in the car, as opposed to the little grocery shopping that requires nothing more than a few carrier bags and some time to walk home. I love the feeling of having a full pantry. Just knowing that people could drop in or it could flood rain and I'd be covered. No need to go out if I don't want to. I have had this same charge about a full pantry since I was a kid. Not that we ever went hungry but with four kids in the family we sometimes ran out of the good stuff and nothing was left but the bare necessities. Then it would be a big grocery haul day and all the great things would be back in the pantry and freezer.

Else there's not much much else. More blah with sparks of interesting things. Nice this is that life will shift ever so slightly and those things that spur us to action will be back with a vengence. I'm waiting for the shift.


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