Christmas Market

I'm afraid I'm getting a little too wrapped up in this diabetes thing. My day seems to revolve around eating at the right times, taking my medication and taking my blood sugar. I fret over nearly everything I eat and when I do have a literal bite of something that's not strictly good for me I don't enjoy it as much as I maybe should.

Well that's not 100% true either. I went down to the Christmas market today. Even if it is the same old stuff every year - same vendors selling the same things - I still like to go. I like the feeling of walking around and taking it all in. It's the sure fire way to put me in the Christmas mood if I'm slipping off the wagon a little.

I was very good at avoiding those things I should eat. Lebkuchen hearts, french burned peanuts, waffles, Schmalzkuchen...I walked on by them. Bratwurst isn't so hard to skip because you can get grilled bratwurst all year long. But the fish...the fish from Holland...it's irresistable.

I'd actually made an effort at resisting - wanting to avoid that fat and all - but I rationalized my way on over to one of the fish sellers. I got an order of Kibbelinge...or however you spell it- it's a Dutch thing...and it was fantastic. Finger length sized chunks of white fish dipped in batter and fried to crispy, delicious goodness. With some remoulade on the side. It was hard not to make the food orgasm humming noise as I was eating but I'm sure it would have only frightened the old folks standing around me reveling in their own hunks of crispy, steaming fish.

And you know when all was said and done, my blood sugar was fine. Not elevated a bit. Not that I'm going to run back for more fish. Not until next year anyway.

I'm glad I went down to the Christmas market even though originally I wasn't in the mood and had been tempted to skip it. I was also able to pick up a small gift for my MIL and on the way home I saw a store, actually was reminded of its exsistance, where I want to go to look for a gift for B. I've been wanting to get him a long, flat, narrow wooden box in which to keep his glasses and I think a store called the Wood Store will probably be a good place to start looking!

Maybe I can get back down there Friday morning if it's not raining.

Where have I been?

Certainly not here in the last two months.

I don't even know where to begin catching up on lost time. Maybe I'll give some Reader's Digest-esque cut downs of my life during my absence or maybe I'll just start from right now.

Well right now won't make any sense until I tell you what's been going on.

After an enormous amount of preparation I flew to Mississippi to see my family. My first visit to my hometown in 3 1/2 years. Entirely too long and yet when I hit town it all seemed to familiar to my eyes that I didn't even have to get used to how things looked. The only new things I found were a new Back Yard Burger (heavenly!) and an establishment on Highway 45 called "King's Kars". How much do I detest the practice of spelling C words with a K in an effort to look catchy?

To say I was busy during my visit would be an understatement. I had somewhere to go, something to do, something to buy every freaking day. I loved it. I loved being out, I loved driving, I loved running little errands, I loved being where their culture is my culture.

And on the inbetween weekend my darling friends came to visit me. Mollie, Lisa, Chelle, Lorrie, Candy, Judi and Michele. I never dreamed we'd have the fantastic time that we did. It really was one of those "pinch me, I'm dreaming" experiences. I loved being with every single one of them and if I have a complaint then it would be to say the time together wasn't long enough.

I may touch back on some things that happened on my trip but on the last day there I started down the road to a life change. No drama, just an awakening.

I didn't have to leave for Memphis until 3pm so my sister and I spent the time beforehand doing some last minute shopping. I'd skipped breakfast that morning so I could pack (and of course neglect some things like the freaking $40 of books that I bought!) and my sister took that opportunity to meaure my blood sugar. I'd been constantly complaining about how thirsty I was even if I'd down glass after glass of whatever I was drinking and of course that roused her suspicions.

It was over 260. Just ridiculous for not having eaten anything in about 16 hours. After shopping and lunch she took it again and it was over 270. My sister made me promise that I'd tell the doctor about it and get her to look into the problem. And I fully intended to - after Christmas. I mean for real...who wants to be told their a diabetic a few weeks before Christmas?

Evidently I do because a week and a half later I did see my doctor and she measured my blood sugar. It was nearly 450. E-freaking-gad! Even the doctor nearly wet her pants. She immediately put me on medication and we did the whole talk about what I have to cut out of my diet.

Not too hard to figure out that even if I had a Back Yard Burger here, I would not be patronizing their establishment. And I shall no longer be a fine customer of Milka chocolates.

Now I'm up to three pills a day. Sugary snacks and desserts are virtually eliminated from my diet. I'm exercising. Good grief, I'm exercising more regularly than I ever have before. And while I can't wait to lose weight, it's not about eliminating a fat ass. It's being sure I'm not going to be eliminated. It put the fear of God in me and I hope that fear stays. I hope it's not going to be some novelty that only wears off after time. I have to make this change and it's got to be permanent.

My blood sugar after eating today was 120. I'm thrilled...for today.