Dixie Peach: After Having Watched a News Piece About Asparagus Season

Cooler than the other side of the pillow.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

After Having Watched a News Piece About Asparagus Season

B: Did you know that if you can asparagus while you're having your period, the asparagus will go bad?

Me: Where did you get that idea?

Everyone knows that. Everyone I know.

That's nothing but an old wives' tale or something. How in the world would having your period make the canning go bad? How would the asparagus know something like that? It's asparagus.

I don't know, but it does. When you touch the asparagus or something. Your chemistry or something makes it go bad. It'll be spoiled.

That sounds ridiculous. Who would believe something like that? That menstruation would make canning go bad?

Just canning asparagus. But it's true. Ask my mom.

You want me to ask your mother? The same woman who went to the village witch to make the warts on her fingers go away?

And it worked! She went to the witch and then her warts disappeared! Everyone went to the village witch to have their skin problems cured!

Well then. There you go.


Blogger J said...

How about trying it and letting us know.

11:11 PM  
Blogger The DP said...

yeah WWP, go can some asparagus!
DOn't knock witches. I have a pretty bad sprained back that my entourage is convinced is a result of witchcraft.

11:35 PM  
Blogger Dixie said...

Ooo J! You posted at 11:11. I have a thing about seeing 11:11. And that it happened to appear on a witchy post makes it seem spooky.

I could try this myself but I won't for some very good reasons:

A. While my husband adores asparagus, I detest it. I'm not canning asparagus just for my husband to eat. Even he would think that's too much trouble, even for an experiment.

B. He hates canned asparagus anyway.

C. If I wanted out-of-season asparagus I would much rather buy frozen.

D. When asparagus season rolls around my husband eats so much of it that he doesn't even want it the rest of the year.

E. My ovaries were removed six years ago. Even if A-D didn't apply, E definitely makes the experiment impossible for me to perform. I would, however, be happy for someone else to perform the experiment and learn of the results.

DP - You're right. I could be courting a disaster if I am seen as sneering at witches. At least courting warts.

12:48 AM  
Blogger TitanKT said...

This reminds me, I was going to report back to you about the olive oil Hellmanns mayonnaise.

It's not good. Do not buy it. It does not have the correct texture OR flavor and I'm about to throw out a whole jar of it. I'm also not a huge fan of the canola oil version... I can't imagine why the type of oil used to make the mayo is such a big deal, but I guess since that's pretty much all it is except for egg, it must be. The canola is just a bit too sweet in the wrong way and it is also not the correct texture. There's something visceral about scooping out a big spoon of mayo and it's got that eggy gloppyness that we love. The pastier stuff is just... no, no good.

The regular Hellmanns is the only stuff. You're not missing anything on the other versions. So now you know.

5:59 AM  
Blogger christina said...

LOL! Our next door neighbour is SURE that if you walk on the lawn in bare feet before May 1 you will die of pneumonia.

Canned asparagus is evil anyway.

P.S. My word verification is "ments". Hee.

11:26 AM  
Anonymous Dee said...

I will never be able to do this experiement either, since I am in early menopause and thus finally free from The Curse. Yay! However, I will not eat canned asparagus exxcept in a casserole anyway, so no big deal. Fresh asparagus is sooooooo much better. When my brother lived in Germany they liked the white asparagus. Is that the kind your hubby likes?

7:16 PM  
Blogger Dixie said...

Katy - Thanks for the Hellmann's test. Darling Mollie had asked me recently if I wanted to try the canola oil type and I chickened out on trying it out. Seems I made the correct decision!

Christina - What in the world is it with Germans and their fear of drafts, bare feet, cool breezes and whatnot? My MIL has a cow every time I drive with the window down and she gets wind on her. Unreal!

Dee - White asparagus is what's common here so it's what's preferred. I'd never even seen white asparagus before moving here - but then I'm not an asparagus expert.

9:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I got curious and tried to see if I could find this superstition about canning, but didn't. However, I found a couple interesting facts. In India they believe it promotes fertility and relieves menstrual cramps. In the Western world they believe it to be an aphrodiisiac. The only downside of eating asparagus is it makes your pee smell funny, but it is harmless.

10:29 PM  
Blogger The Frizzy Hooker said...

I love learning new things

6:15 PM  

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