An offer
It occured to me that some of you who read here may have never had contact with anyone who is a para or quadriplegic. Your only exposure may be through Christopher Reeve and watching The Bone Collector on DVD. Some of you may be curious about life as a quadriplegic or what life with a quadriplegic is like and maybe you've even thought to ask me but felt shy or felt as though it would be prying.
I'll make the offer that if you have a question about B and me and how he is and how I take care of him or anything else related that comes to you mind, just leave your questions here in the comments and at the end of the week I'll answer them all. I can't answer for all quadriplegics and those who care for them (although some things are general to most quads) but I'll answer your questions as it relates to our own experience.
So if you want to know how B became paralyzed or how we live or anything else, here's your chance to ask anything you please and I'll try to answer your questions as plainly as possible. Don't feel as though you're being nosy - it's better to get an honest answer and have the knowledge than go around with bad assumptions.
10Comments:
Is there any chance that you would be willing to give your husband to a good friend? I mean, lets SAY you had a friend who had a crush on your husband- nice person, responsible, etc. Any chance?
Asking for a "friend".
Love you both!
M
ps- I like this. I had a lot of questions all those years ago (is it really almost SEVEN?!) and you were so open.
I love that you're so open and willing to share. You answered my most pressing question while we were eating ribs at Rendezvous nearly five years ago.
(For those of you who can't figure that out, it's the sex question. You know you're thinking it.)
I'd like to know how you went about learning to care for B. Were you scared? Was it overwhelming?
Mikki at http://dancinginplace.blogspot.com/ wasn't able to leave me a comment but she did send me an email and asked me to post it here in my comments:
Great job on opening up the floor for people to ask questions. I've just finished reading the new post and think that it's an excellent idea.
People have occasionally e-mailed me and asked questions very tactfully and of course it never bothered me, I think that it's much better for someone to just ask their questions rather than to just presume. And I'm sure that B feels the same.
Because I do think that spinal cord injury is a very different ball of wax than many other disabilities. And a lot of people have probably not come in contact with a quad or para suffered from accidents like ours. Imagine that!
I am e-mailing this and not commenting because for some reason I have not been able to leave comments on anyone's blogs since this afternoon. It's frustrating.
Mikki
Hi!! Yup, I got a question or two.... I am sure I could find the answers someplace in the many, many previous post of yours, but because you asked, I'll go ahead and ask. I want to know ('cuz I'm a romintic kind of guy) I want to know about the first time you met. What was the situation there. What was it that made your heart flutter? What made you fall in love with this man. What was his condition when you met? Was he born a parapaliegic or was it from some sort of accident. If he was healthy when you fell in love with him I want to know are the same traits you fell in love with still there? If he was a parapaliegic when you met him I want to know what qualities in him made you fall in love with him and move to Germany. I want to know what his condition is today and what your feelings are for him today. What does he do that upsets you the most and what he does that makes you love him the most. Is that enough, 'cuz I got more. Is he a Werder fan? In your profile you ask "is it worth it?" I want to know what? What is worth it? What did you gain by moving here? Are you truely happy here? Do you have any regrets about your decision to love this man? Given a chance would you do it all over again? Given the condition of your husband I gotta ask if he can communicate with you. I want to know if he can communicate with us... your readers. Does he blog on his own? I gotta know. Yea, I got questions for you.... but damn!! If I could ask your hubby some things.... It wouldnt end. But my first question for him would be.." Where did you find such a wonderful frau?
Mollie is asking for me, in case you didn't guess. Molls, they know I ain't too proud to beg.
I just want to know if B is a good kisser. I know it's shallow, but after all these years, I just wanna know..
does b like the younger girls? like, say, those who are 23? and work for ginormous internet companies that have a web site in german too? if i ever visit germany, can i come visit you two? will you make me tea from your ridiculously expensive tea tin?
I want to know how you deal with your husband's German-ness. Do you ever feel like he is being sarcastic? I feel like Germans are sarcastic all the time. I cannot tell if they are happy or what.
Also I want to know how expensive his gear is in Germany as compared to gear in the US. Does he have the latest gear, what kind of chair does he have, like, and so on. Just curious.
How does your husband cope with your peach related obsession?
What are your favourite flavours of ice cream (or in American: favorite flavors)?
What is your "our song"? You know the song that sums the relationship all up.
Julie Andrews or Julie Christie?
How's about them?
I've been saying for years that their courtship and romance belong in a book- and I still say that!
Moll
ps- pkb: You angler! Hope you are doing well- miss you!
I remember awhile back you stated that you take your husband out and about but long walks become uncomfortable. I have been wondering if you do all the work yourself? Like moving him from his chair to another place? And I was wondering about the discomfort, how much feeling does he have? What is it like? And of course how did it happen?
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