My Ever After

Today, July 30th, isn't my wedding anniversary. Tomorrow, July 31st, is. Same day as Harry Potter's birthday. We didn't pick that day to get married because of Harry Potter. B and I picked that date because it was the Saturday that the Standesamt (what is essentially the bureau that handles marriages) was performing weddings. We'd originally picked July 24th and had even gone ahead and had our wedding rings inscribed with the date 24.07.99 before we found out that date wasn't open. I wore for years a wedding ring with the wrong date engraved inside, it driving me nuts the entire time, until on our 5th wedding anniversary when B bought me a new wedding ring with the correct wedding date inside.

While this isn't the anniversary of our wedding, July 30, 1999 is still special to me. While many brides spend the day before their wedding as nervous wrecks, I spent mine completely relaxed. Everything was in place for the big day - our wedding clothes, food, transportation, music...if we needed it to get married, it was in hand. All I needed was a good night's sleep and a good hair day the next day. I got neither one - too excited for the former and too unskilled at handling my new hairstyle for the latter - but none of it ended up mattering in the least. What mattered was how I felt on July 30th.

July 30th is the anniversary of the one and only time I was anticipating doing something and having absolutely no second thoughts, no doubts, no fears and no regrets. It was the one time when I knew my decision was 100% correct. I knew before we married our how our marriage would be. It was the one time when I had full confidence in myself and what I was about to do and it was such a liberating feeling.

I certainly never had such a feeling on the eve of my first wedding. I spent that day in dread and wished I could have gotten out of it without my mother pinching my head off for it. I wish I'd had that feeling of confidence on the eve of that wedding. No one should get married with an unsettled feeling.

The day before I married B was such a good day. All day we talked about how our dream was finally coming true and that we couldn't wait to get started on our married life. We talked about how we truly felt as though we were marrying the person who was perfect for us and we wished and prayed that we would have many happy years together. Both of us knew that no matter what the future would bring, we'd see it through together and that being together was the only option for us.

And now eight years later I feel even happier than I did on the eve of our wedding if for no other reason that I know I was right. I know beyond any doubt that marrying B was the right thing to do and that even if I make no other right decisions in my life, at least I got the most important one right.

I love you, my darling. Without end. Without limits. Without a doubt.

Happy anniversary.